Angel
by WingedWolf
Summary: Someone's missing from Adam's life. Songfic for Angel by Aerosmith


Angel

The moment he looked up at the house, he knew she wasn't at home. He always felt it when she was there. It was as if his heart knew there was a reason for being in this place and she was it. However, he couldn't understand what he was doing there now, staring at the empty place with a pang of anguish and confusion. The stars weren't so brilliant tonight and the deep blue of the sky that usually made him want to stare up in awe, merely sat there, empty as he felt. The wind blew unmercilessly, and the cold snow bit his skin, so it registered in his brain that he should go inside. For a moment, he just a couldn't, but a gust of air that nearly brought him to his knees forced him towards the potential warmth of the house. 

I'm alone

Yeah I don't know if I can face the night

I'm in tears

And the crying that I do is for you

He cried the whole way up to the porch. Not with sobs, but just silent tears. They meant more, for some reason. He hadn't meant to hurt her, hadn't meant to push her away the way he did. His job was the thing they fought about most, but she never told him to quit. Not once. Why had he taken it that way? What had he been thinking? That she couldn't have possibly understood? He sat at the table and pushed his hands through his long, blonde hair. The shock of how stupid he's been was still there. That first thought that maybe she wouldn't come back... maybe he'd be alone again... His eyes widened, tears still falling from them. He looked around desperately as the realization dawned upon him; he was little more than a lost child. He'd brought this suffering upon himself. By building up that wall, and pushing her away...

I want your love

Let's break the walls between us

Don't make it tough

I'll put away my pride

Enough's enough

I've suffered and I've seen the light

You don't do this to people you love. He thought. But he'd done it to her, one way or the other. What could he say to get her back? Were there words? An indescriable feeling of drowning came over him. He should've loved her more. That's all he wanted to do. Love her. Maybe if she knew, she'd come back and hold him and say everything was okay. She always did that for him. Why not now, when he needed it most?

Baby, you're my angel

Come and save me tonight

You're my angel

Come and make it alright

He hadn't felt this alone since before he met her. It was this horrible feeling he didn't know what to do with. The stairs creaked under his weight as he went up to the bedroom. Knowing very well he couldn't sleep, he sat on the bed. It was amazing, he didn't know what to do with himself. The darkness and the loniless and the pain were all familiar to him, but the the feeling that he'd lost something was not.

Don't know what I'm gonna do

About this feeling inside

Yes it's true

Loneliness took me for a ride

How could've he have let her get away so easily? The sensation that he was incomplete without her should have been enough. Now that he'd had her, he needed her or he'd waste away and die. He couldn't function without her. Couldn't wrestle, couldn't live.

Without your love

I'm nothing but a beggar

Without your love

A dog without a bone

What can I do

I'm sleeping in this bed alone

He pulled the covers back and crawled under the sheets, which were unpleasantly cold to the touch. Outside the wind howled, slowly winding down the terrific storm it had once been, but he couldn't hear it. All he could hear was her voice. And that loving acceptance of him and who he was. He'd turned it away. For this emptiness. For nothing.

You're the reason I live

You're the reason I die

You're the reason I give

When I break down and cry

Don't need no reason why

Sleep finally found him in the dead of night. His eyes finally closed, having spent their tears. The hollowness of realizing that she wasn't coming back to him sunk in deeper and deeper. The phone rang, and just as sleep took hold of him, it let go.

"Hello?"

There's was nothing on the other line for a few seconds. His hopes were shattered. It was probably Matt, or Jay calling to check on him. Then he heard her voice. "Adam?"

"Yes?" He said, finding his voice at the last second. That one, infernal, hopeful maybe sang in his ears and he listened intently.

"I... I just wanted to check on you. Make sure you got home okay in the storm."

He let out breath he hadn't realized he was holding. "I'm fine. I got home okay. How are you? Is everything all right?" He shoved the covers back again. Prepared to go over to her house in his robe if he had to.

She strangled a cry that had been caught in her throat. He understood how much he'd hurt her and it almost make him start to cry again. "I'm... I miss you," Her voice seemed to tremble at these words.

"Can you come over? Is that okay with you?" His pulse raced at the thought of seeing her. Even if she was still angry with him. He just wanted to see her.

"I'm already at the door."

He didn't even bother hanging up the phone.

Baby, baby, baby, you're my angel

Come and save me tonight

You're my angel

Come and make it alright

You're my angel

Come and save me tonight

(Isn't it enough)

You're my angel

Come and take me alright

Come and save me tonight

Come and save me tonight

Come and save me tonight

Come and save me tonight

Come and save me tonight

  
  



End file.
